(Mini) Public Statement Regarding My Father

In Uncategorized on March 30, 2015 at 22:19

If I continue to see what has been transpiring within the Bangladeshi community since my father’s death,

I will send the following public statement to every newspaper, journalist, and news source available.

Due to possible negative repercussions of this action for those that I need to protect from media damage, and any possible negative repercussions to my father’s legacy, I am holding off – For now.

I continue to hold my tongue about matters which are completely obscene in measurement of human ethics,

and live in patience. I hope that My media silence, and My absence from the societal hoopla surrounding my father’s death will navigate away all drama surrounding his passing and allow public interest to re-focus on that which mattered most to him – SCIENCE. 

Nonetheless, this is my small private corner of the planet which I share openly with a select group of genuine people, and it is necessary that I do shed at least a tiny spotlight upon some of the nonsense which has been happening.

If you have stumbled upon this page because you Knew My Father, personally or professionally, whether through internet search or otherwise,  – may you have the wisdom to not give your attention to publicized nonsense about him, his life, or his “family”, and instead research his articles and lifetime of work. I assure you, any “family members” of his across the globe who claim ties, and are ridiculously attempting to weasel their way into his hard-achieved accomplishments, I know for a fact he would Not consider his “family”.

I can feel his disappointment in clouds from his grave.


Dear Bangladeshi Community:

As Dr.Maqsudul Alam’s only living biological daughter,

I make this statement with a singular purpose – an assertive request that

you all stop what you have been doing. 

I have watched in painful silence as all of you have terribly violated my father’s good name.

My Father was a man who valued science, who valued integrity, human character, nobility, strength, and passion, the joy of discovering the vast fields within the world of science as the highest constituents to achieve in life. My father loved science. Loved science. As in, he devoted his entire life to both his country and his work. That should be what he is known for. Nobody on this planet should be googling his name and seeing articles pop up that have nothing to do with his research. And I am severely angry to see that much of his name coincides with the articles you are all printing, which include little about research and more about everything tangenial. Much of what I’ve read have been reports on what my “family members” have been destroying of my father’s legacy of science since his passing.

The same people who have the audacity to call themselves his “family members”, who should be supportive of the values he lived for, have instead, done the exact opposite, and massacred his name by attempting to use it to further their own public statuses, careers, financial situations, and other such external aims directed by motives of power, greed, and control.

Three values which my father was fundamentally against and did everything in his life to avoid, and to never embody.

The betrayal is painful enough. Especially by people who swore to protect my father, rather than disrupt the holy innocence with which he lived his noble life. But the worst part of all of this is the tremendous amount of absolute falsity I’ve seen over the past several months in every member of the Alam “family”.

Especially when those family members are non academia, have never entered the world of the mind or science Prior to my father’s passing (yet have jumped all over his entrails as blood-thirsty vultures anxious to feed on true nobility After his death), nor aspired to any ambitions beyond the most trivial and trite in their entire pathetic existences, have zero comprehension of science, or who my father was as an individual.

Any supposed familial relations to those who would be otherwise unrelated by blood, and are simply tied to Our Name from the legalities of marriage, are all, in my opinion, the most hideous, vile, horrendously monstrous form of human excrement I have ever seen. I Thank God that my father could rest before being exposed to the real truth of their snake-like nastiness.

Please pay no mind nor give encouraging energy to these monsters, leeches, parasites, and gossiping filths.

Just because someone holds the last name “Alam” doesn’t give them the right to impugn their dirty footprints all over the immaculate glory of my father’s dreams. So please ignore them. Entirely.

For the record, I don’t consider any of these people my family,

and I damn well know that my father would be shocked if he knew about what each of their hideous hearts are up to.

I Thank God, that he is resting peacefully so that he didn’t have to bear witness to it. Then again, the soul is everlasting, and God knows Everything.

Every thought, every action, every intent, every choice and decision.

I firmly ask that you as a journalistic community, if you hold yourselves up to even slight standards of moral integrity and character, that you desist in using my father’s death as a publicity gossip event and that you stop giving attention to family members who hold my father’s name. 

That includes me. Forget that you even read this, just remember what I’ve outlined.

My Father’s Research is what mattered.

So if you choose to blast your newspapers full of anything,

let it be about SCIENCE.

Thank you.


Liliana Alam.


—– as a last note to this, if you have trouble reaching me, it is because I am in the process of writing a book about my father’s life, his research, and his journey into the unknown. I prefer to be undisturbed in my concentration until it is completed. Thanks.

Waiting For Oblivion

In Uncategorized on March 30, 2015 at 21:50

and in the dawn of the nights, and the dawns of the day, he waited. he waited for oblivion, for blossoming, for time and for space to collide into the infinite proportions of an intangible reality that only his own mind understood. he waited for salvation. for the gods to open their mouths and flood the earth with sanctity, valor, might, triumph, mortality. he was tired of his own immortality. he was ready to die. he was ready to be amongst them who had enraged his soul for centuries, alone in a tomb, digging his nails into the bedding of sheets without homes. he was ready to join them, and to massacre them. plotting this in silence for years, he had formulated a faultless plan. execution was eminent, for the metaverses had grown restless and void of colours. his eyes were the only eyes in the history of all worlds, which knew things. they knew things so vast, so complex, so deep, that the mammals spoke in his tongues. he had learned to move the winds, he had learned how to train his thoughts to order the universe around him. he had learned how to manipulate at will, as easily as they ate their foods of poison. while he sat in a tower, flooding their lives with meaning. first it was the incessant need to engulf them in flames, to completely destroy all control they had for themselves and make himself into the grand master of it all. he had achieved this, and it had not been easy, but he had done it. and now he wanted none of it, yelling in furious irony at the ruins of his kingdom. nothing left, for nothing truly gained. nothing lost, for nothing truly won. and so he waited. for that oblivion that would never come, that would never dance, that would never speak, that would never embrace his sentiment. it had all been, a dream.

“and why have you done this? “ , spoke gabriel.

“because I had nothing left to answer.” , he remarked in solemness.

“but they will never be what you had intended for them.”

“I know. and that, I have only now realized, is my curse.”

gabriel flew towards the light, wrapping the room in a red mist, leaving visibility and form

in favor of beautiful transience.

“do you want then, to be as I am, a dead one?”

just because of no reason

In Uncategorized on March 15, 2015 at 20:24

come into the desert

our run far past space

hold my hand as we voyage together

where the earths don’t know our names

I tell you forget these buildings

high rises and thick chains

away we’ll go forever

just you and me infinitely

you tell me you fear for survival

you tell me you fear for fame

I tell you we are holy

I tell you we are strange

civilization isn’t for us,

they don’t understand you or me

you tell me you are worried

I tell you we must use our instincts

where is thy trust? thy might in faith?

lets go back from where we first came

because I need you.

and you need me.

God knows all free beings.

imagine there’s no judgment

it’s easy if you lie

no hell above us

below us only flight

imagine there’s no nation

no archetype nor stamp

imagine I stole your identity

then taught you the algorithms of chance

imagine no possessions

because you gave them all to god

imagine you’re an animal

and the world will live as one

you might say that I’m a traitor

that I’ve broken the sacred codes

well I say I am a savior

honest to my heart of bones

I hope someday that you will join us

those who write their own laws in black stone.

see your blood in the river? – there; my home.

The Difference between Sex and Love

your Name and a Dove

The Difference between You

The Difference between Me

if you disappear I’ll find you and make you bleed

you will scream, you will die, you will fly into the sky

because there are differences.

Go! Flee!

The Difference between Sex and Love

is Me.

“Could I Love You?”

I know I’m not the one for you

but could I love you as I do?

dream of your heart and your whole soul

sing praise for every word you spoke

I’ll never be good enough to stand

beside you on the road of life

but could I admire your star above?

could I fill my thoughts analyzing your great mind?

I’m ordinary and you are grand

but could I love you as if I am?

your paradise is perfect pure

could I pretend to be on that shore?

there’s nothing that I want from you

don’t need a thing for you to do

I’ve only got one question to always ask

could I love you even if you don’t love me back?

if you’d allow this I’ll be glad

and I will love you all my days

throughout all earth, universe, time and space

and when the last ember of me fades, I’ll know my life was not a waste

I know I’m not the one for you

but would you let me be free to love true?

because you are the only one for me

and I can’t lie because I am a tree


you are the air I breathe
the haunt in my sleep
rupture spine, steal organs
wraith within; cannot escape you
this is my decapitation.
fragrant myth alarming all my encapsulations
burst out my bottles into cyanide
faced with you in the same room
I die
I cry
I live
I expire
I fly
I tremble
I shudder
from your power
render me unconscious
unrendered, render
HERE! take it – my pristine surrender
masochist sadist dominating dervish
to the world I say NO!
before you I beg
I scream.
give me you
only and alone.
good God – keep me locked up lest’ I unravel the entirety of your form.


sombers quiet marsh
and I feel you
stone temples in the bark
and I sense you
you are the whip, the echo,
the dirge, the stream
you are the only, the every


faraway dance
this is the faraway land
where you and I waltz
up above the ashes
high into the sun
where you and I are one
one breath, one flesh,
one mist, one soul
I live in these fantasies
I live in the cold – torn; alone


storms he rode the infinite sea
storms he wove Infinity!
Infinitely, Infinitively,
Infinitely Infinite
He stole the tangles
She weaved traces
Infinitely, devotedly,
solemnly, miss thee
missing thee, Infinity,
my Infinite mystery


torrent aghast
because torrent you’ve sought
sung unto to my mothers, my fathers,
unto God
lain on the cross
cross holy, cross demure
he lay as the man
who smiled at the smile
Knewing smiled from the
Knew – Oh thou art, True.


falling kisses from the heavens
grace my lips, cheeks, romances
romance arduous, bold, strong
tender affection, humble song
I stand looking up towards the clouds
I dream of you as the rain pours down


so soft and strange
the withered windmill
scraggled, worn, up on the hill
blowing wind to all the world
somewhere there-in, my soul


silent trees; silent stallions
steady woman, still flowers
you are mine
I am yours
tree of stature
flower of poem
man and woman
soul and heart
mind and bone
howl – our howl – at the moon


effervescent, straight sturdy; wisp

thought determinedly to myself, “I must get over this”

tears erupting down within – stone face on

a song played in my heart

a song known between the two of our wails – or truly – 1

thump-thump-thump thumpety-bump a spark

echoed masts, and tales, and strings

“whatever you do, don’t come back for me.”

“don’t come back.. for ; me.”

this I thought of the one who is eternity.

knowing now the thought from the one who first thought it :

bonded by emotion emotion strength strength flights Fights

peace? Peace? ah, yes, so rare to find

the inkling of something tender in the wolfish jungle race

survival! SURVIVAL! it’s you or me or you or me or you

welcome to the billion nation of ‘ i don’t care – it’s Your life ‘

oh, hello mirror, strange to find me on the other side

the side that I danced out to hide

now that I am here, I like it fine

the daunting dark suits me as wine.

whatever you do, don’t come back for I

there is naught but air capsized

there is no body, only space and dust

don’t come back for me

whatever I was, all of those was I, have died.

you wouldn’t recognize who it is you saw even if you tried.

to be honest, I could live forever this quiet lie.

understand, that I do, why your layers kept mild

the burning soul

well I still say unleash the fire.

just don’t come back for me for water.

don’t come back for me at all

wispy wisp, effervescent sun.


it is great to be strong,

but it is best to be strong enough to open your bones to the strength of another.

only a narcissist will declare in adamance that help is never required.

some methods of protection are reciprocity of vulnerability.

in understanding the nature which constitutes dualism – a precise fabric which comprises the entire universe, no muscle exists without fiber, no neuron without axon, no yin without yang.

when we look at the shore, the waves, and the moon, each plays its role in shifting tides so that we may walk upon sand and dip our toes into liquid heaven.

of course, we may choose to swim, if the impulse arises.

and if it does not, we may taste the salt of the sea and feel gratitude for the imprints of the ocean upon the shells we are given to listen to.


you were there when I shouted out of the waters
praying to heaven for a way into the holy realms
there in the glimmers of light was always your reflection
as if a memory of a pure perfected self
you were there when I was beaten in the gallows
stripped of dignity, esteem, and respect
you’ve been there whenever I’ve been degraded, neglected,
cast aside, flogged and stripped
I know no truer way of saying thank you
other than giving my best
every flight thus far has been sacred,
on these wings you’ve bionically fused to my raw back
why you chose me I will never understand
I am nothing special but you saw in me something grand
in this gratitude I feel so close to you, closer than the whispering wind


only love lasts forever, and it is fortified in the soul.
flesh is temporal as are the burdens of earth.
so live with your whole heart to nourish your whole soul.
because at the end, that is what matters most.


every time your heart breaks, it glows blacker
every tear your soul sheds, you become darker
every wound your body knows, you become harder
every injury your mind understands, you become coarser
every person that you love, you die, you die
and you wear your death like a shield, like a sheath, like a mask,
hiding a ghost without a name, home, or sound
you can laugh and you can smile, you can cry and you can desire
and you walk these valleys and ridges as a wraith, bound eternally to love
the curse, the cross, the earthquake, plague, locust, flood
every drop more you love, every drop more the blessing
everyone you love will die
everyone you love will die
everyone you love will die
death in body, or in spirit, or in heart, or in soul, or in mind, or of them all
death in the losses of innocence, death in the losses unknown
everyone you love will die.
and with them, so shall you, so will you, and so did you.
cast your eyes then up to Christ, and start it all anew.
remember what you were
before the cursed blessings made a beast out of the child heart eyes you once saw this world through.


student: Master, what to do when depressed?
Master: do something to uplift & help others.


say uh…Fred?
Why do we even bother with helping them? They never listen.
Yeah but…we gotta try man, we gotta try.
Aw ffs. Seriously?
geniuses help stupid people man, geniuses help stupid people,
it’s the only way they’ll survive man, the only way.
I hate you.
Hate them!!! not me!!!!
agh fuck, another sporting event.
organized sports. Fred, they…they fuckin’….they “organize” their sports.
they fling balls at each other for amusement. this is, this is their “fun”.
kill me. kill me now.
we can’t die man, we can’t die.


ACTIVELY shape Your LIFE in honest accordance to the vibrations of your HEART.
What do you love? What do you hate? What do you value?
What do you want? What do you need? What do you dream of?
Whatever it is, You Are RIGHT.
Lie? Sure. It’s allowed. Manipulate? Absolutely. Hustle? 100%! Rules? Don’t exist.
Permission? Never ask for it. Forgiveness? Never demand it. Expectation? Destroy it.
Protect yourself? Always. Protect OTHERS? ALWAYS.
Those places you’ve never been to, those things you’ve never done,
those parts of yourself that you want to be but tell yourself you can’t become?
Design Your Own Fate


“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”     – Lao Tzu


because you are infinitely perfect, I hate everything else.
falling in love with you made me turn away from the whole world with all of its fallacies, falsities, and lies.
my curmudgeony is incurable.
the more I love you, the more I despise anything which is not you.
if you like blue, I hate every other color.
if you like pears, I hate every other fruit.
if you read Dante, I hate every other writer.
if you like this or that, I hate anything which is not this or that.
if anything on this planet even slightly resembles anything you stood for,
I am drawn to it.
then despise it because it is never you.
I have my own tastes and I stand by them,
but your taste is perfection, your brain is perfection, your heart is perfection, your spirit is perfection, your soul is perfection, everything you are, Is, PERFECTION.
you are so perfect it is actually searingly painful.
you are far superior, and all else is inferior, insubstantial, imperfect, incomplete, an irritation, an annoyance, an intrusion.
every hour of every tortured day I want to be with you but I would only interrupt the reign of your holy perfection.
existence is a tormented shadowworld.


“Quick! The nuclear reactor is about to explode!!!!”
“Hmm. Well, you’re either bluffing or…, alright, let me analyze my options.”
and…Intense Hesitance.

“Eh. I’m going to take a shower on the 117th floor. Plumbing still works up there, right?”
“Are you, human?”
“No…….. I thought we had already covered this. I’m Asian, remember?” Sigh. Long pause. Sigh.
“I’m stabbing your hand, as I’m speaking.”
“You are? Oh. Well done. Good, good. Proceed.”
“You’re bleeding.”
“Am I? How fascinating. I…I bleed? Huh. I bleed…Woah. Wow.”
“Ok I give up.”
“You? Give up? Oh, come on. I know you better than that.”
“Fine. Gimme a machete’.”
“I keep that in the other building.”


Don’t be a ghoul! Nothing lasts forever but the potency of a moment.
A moment lived afire by the heart, lasts infinitely.
Collect your moments wisely, because a moment is all you will ever have.
That Sigh? That Tear? That Laugh? That Pain? That Joy? That Sharpness? That shared euphoria of acknowledgement? LIVE in it. There is your cement. Within *YOU is what you’ve always been seeking.


I love you ravenously, wildly, achingly, obsessively, as a focused wolf.
I love you without reason, without void, without absence, without restraint, without inhibition.
I demand you from the Gods for myself. I denounce these cities, I denounce everything. Because I love you.
I love… you.
and You? You don’t love me.
What a glorious life it all is, what a heightened pain, what a sublime rapture.
Thank you. I thank you. May you live eternally.


Every person you encounter is a test from God.


To Each Sister Across Earth:

Woman… Ethereal, Fragile, Sensitive, Sensuous, Divine, Brilliant, Powerful, as tiny as all which is precious, as vast as all which is endless. Not a plaything, not a tool, not a proximity nor an infatuation. Wisdom, intelligence, majesty, nobility. Her heart knows the many wounds of sacrifice, yet her manner echoes composure. Swift and elegant, graceful and mysterious, she reminds us that softness is strength. Complex in fragrance, simple in precision. Her form, her sophistry, her delicate skin. Her Soul. Her Spirit. Her Mind. Her Essence. Her Creativity. Her Innocence. Her Purity. Her Unique-ness.
The Princess. The Goddess. The Muse.
Let us not let her star fade and wilt in a world which has become desensitized from appreciating what she is. Thank You to every woman out there who exemplifies mythology every day she exists, for remembering what You are in a world which constantly tries to diminish you into something you’re not.


why are we so afraid to love? what the f are we so afraid of? why have we built a society where people are afraid to love each other? why do we put up shields to mask the realest part of ourselves? why are we obsessed with everything other than what we should be obsessed with? loving each other. this is planet earth. this is a planet of people. this is a planet of people who need to be loved and who need love.
when did we start denying our deepest needs and replacing them with fluff? with borders? with guns?
when did the heart of the human being break?
can we fix ourselves? can we love ourselves? Yea. We can.
lets stop saying the words, lets start thinking them and feeling them, lets start being them, all the time, everywhere, with ourselves, with everyone.
this isn’t about peace. peace isn’t really enough. it’s mild and temperate and boring. it’s not world peace we need.
it’s ‪#‎WORLD‬ ‪#‎LOVE‬ ‪#‎WorldLove‬


you were at the laboratory
I was watching movies
you were driving on a highway
I was at the beach
strangers always talked to me
like the whole of the lot think I know things
the principals and counselors adored you
I aced tests without studying, they hated me for it
when they called me to the office they told me “your Father’s here”
I smiled in excitement
maybe we could finally have that coffee
but you told me you were going on a business trip somewhere in Japan
here’s some cash, here’s some numbers, don’t call me
there was this couple down by the docks, supermodels from europe
laughing I asked them “don’t you slackers go to work?”
they hinted at a menage’, I wasn’t in the mood for that kind of party
they whispered, “I love you” and kissed each other’s lips as I watched in silence
you got us an apartment, made of wood, in the mountains
I painted every day, we went on long hikes and ate tomato soup.
first official job that summer, Mom was visiting, took you both out sailing on the water
hoped to reconcile the damage you two had done with this fresh paycheck in my hands
first failure of many, wondered what magic I’d need to weave
majored in neuroscience and threw my paintbrushes in the trash
boasted to all your colleagues about me, it was a lie but you looked happy
anything to keep you happy, keep you happy, you’re my Dad.
my adolescence grew up in airports and suitcases.
Mom was always dating losers. I put some superglue on one of their toothbrushes
for an expensive lady, she sure had awful taste
invited me for the wedding, my organs were vomiting
it was a lie but she told me she was happy, to leave it all alone, what could I do.
calls me up 4 am, 2 am, 1 am, ‘he’s an asshole, he’s abusive, I should get a divorce’
“come live with me, we’ll get through this, you deserve much more than him.”
she doesn’t take me up on my offer but calls me every day, cries waterfalls and I miss a ton of gigs,
never told her, worth it.
years later I’m the bad guy, and he still calls her “bitch”.
you let her go, like a yacht, a boat. you did your best, wasn’t enough to hold her.
we’d watch the waves on the ocean, look at old photographs as if they were newspapers
we’d think “maybe if we had been better, she would’ve stayed with us.”


Dear Starbucks, McCafe’, Coffee Bean, Pete’s Coffee, Dutch Brothers, and 7-11,

This note is being written in between heaving emasculated gasps whilst sobbing.

Today I was feeling nauseatingly antsy
and craved you with a desperation that can only be described as tortured insanity.
Habitual inclinations prevailed and my impulse to own you propelled me into performing
the rites of an animalistic dance towards the direction of my sneakers.
I glimpsed at a photo of the two of us pinned to the fridge,
I was holding you in my hand with a whipped cream mustache on my lips. Do you…do you..remember?
You know that I am a coffee junkie, which is why I abhor you.
I’ve supported you tirelessly with pieces of green paper for many years to fuel my own madness,
despite my sheepish acknowledgment that your magical confections are grossly overpriced however glorious they smell and taste.
It has pained me repeatedly to be served coffee by bright smiling faces blooming with potential far beyond being minimum-wage baristas.
Your “these cups fund orphans in Africa” crap never made me feel better about my narcissistic indulgences either.
The torment in my raging soul has not once been progressively appeased after drinking your stimulating fluids because an empty cup, irregardless of being “biodegradable/recyclable” (bitch, please) or not, solves precisely none of my problems.
Addiction to caffeine hasn’t made me more productive, original, or imaginative.
I’ve been dressing in business suits as an excuse to buy you. Venti.
Please, my truest amor, do not weep. This isn’t your fault!
You’re just trying to be a good little company providing love and happiness to billions of people,
you’ve done nothing wrong and have nothing to be ashamed of. I understand completely. It’s all me and my uncontrollable urges
entirely absent of subliminal manipulation embedded in heavenly colorful advertisements and wholesome marketing.
I’ve affected all of humanity through my negligent, irresponsible actions. You, in total opposition My Darling, are an Angel and far too good for me. I admire and respect you for all the good you’ve done for mankind. Especially for the orphans who work 9-5 to grind coffee beans, they
wouldn’t be employed without your generosity.
It is the peak of human benevolence to educate/brainwash/indoctrinate innocent young minds with valuable lessons about the real world.
This real world exists after all, because you’ve built it with your own two hands. People. Need. Buildings. This is why churches exist.
God is blind, homeless and doesn’t have GPS.

Naturally, our percentages of contribution are unequal and thus this unsymbiotic relationship is coming to an end.
It is with a content sadness that I report I brewed my own coffee,
poured it into a tall thermos, put on a warm sweater, and went outside for a stroll in the sharp cold wind.

I don’t need you anymore.


Idolatry. Worship. Imitation. Obedience. Servitude. Rivalry. Competition. War. WHY.

—–> Be Your Own Hero


We are, each of us, gloriously sparkling butterflies of stardust.


” Revolution begins within, then extends outwards. The world will never change permanently through politics, religion, paradigms or schemes because each of these is an impersonal application of ideas to fix fundamentally skewered human practices. What do we all dream of as a collective? Peace, love, freedom, happiness. What is in the way? Control, power, greed, falsity; all pillars founded upon the concept that human dreams can only be achieved by negating ‘humanness’. What is, ‘humanness’? Is ‘humanness’ a vague term invented by hippies, a pretentiously elitist stance on spirituality as being reserved to sunflowers and activist protests? Should we then punish ourselves for the often contradictive desires within which do not cater to archetypal labels instilled everywhere as commands directing our courses of destiny? When did human destiny become a negotiable trading chip and why is it necessary to compromise who each of us are as summative-ly conscious people? Humanness is the height of all the best elements that comprise what a complete human being is. I’ve never met a lawyer who didn’t like sunsets…I’ve never met a policeman who didn’t like music…I’ve never met a banker who didn’t like eye contact…I’ve never met a CEO who didn’t like connection…I’ve never met a homeless person who didn’t like creme’ brûlée’…I’ve never met a bohemian artist who didn’t appreciate a ferrari…I’ve never met a programmer who didn’t like a child’s laughter…I’ve never met an athlete who didn’t enjoy movies…Each of us have many similar hopes, desires, and dreams – instead of racing other humans, let’s instead advance the human…

All Change Is ~^The Individual^~ ”


I’ll tell you something gorgeous Sasquatch, everything is pain. EVERYTHING.
Any billboard, advertisement, or product that proclaims otherwise is lying.
Lemme spell something out for you genius.
FACTS: Spouses cheat. Beauty ages. Synapses deteriorate. Markets collapse. There will Always be someone better-looking, smarter, stronger, more talented, better skilled, better than you, who either is who you want to be or has what you want to attain. Get jealous? Get even? Succumb to the misery of comparison? Heh. Fuck that! Boring.
So what have you got left? What do each of us do with the hellhole of a situation that we find ourselves in, this human condition? What happens in the nano-second of sharp grasping woe after a prayer? I tell you what we do my sisters and brothers,
we FEEL THAT PAIN, we get HIGH from it, we live another minute, another day, another night. We survive mooshed together as one organism, giggling in a happy dappy kum-ba-yah rain dance. That’s all there is to it. I whisper to you from the depths of my heart, it really is a beautiful life. Every second.


I had a box of crayons once. I had a pair of scissors.
Now I’m drifting in a sandstorm and smoking quantum physics.
It reminds me of my days trapped in a university of tools, determined to prove their obedience to the trap of accolade rule. I bled with every professor to give me a laboratory and a hermit cave, so that I could set my ideas free to liberate the human race. They laughed at me but offered to trap me into the burdens of a phD. I said, “Fuck You, Assholes” and drank green tea.
This didn’t please my family, who all think I’m a freak. I’d rather be hated by everyone than allow my soul to be diseased.
Sometimes a man would come along, singing pretty songs. I listened to them with an open mind and a fully receptive heart.
Kinda dumb to think that hope would be interpreted as wrong.
Misunderstandings left behind, the industries of Pyrex were worse, they’d like to tame a wild beast into a thoroughbred horse, sell the parts of it for glue.
I’ve often wandered the hills, valleys, and all the 9 seas, looking for something deeper than the entrails of mystery.
Still searching…, you can’t rob my faith from me. Eh, Yo, Megalomaniac,
you aint’ God, and I’m still free.



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