LILIANA.ALAM

just because of no reason

In Uncategorized on March 15, 2015 at 20:24

come into the desert

our run far past space

hold my hand as we voyage together

where the earths don’t know our names

I tell you forget these buildings

high rises and thick chains

away we’ll go forever

just you and me infinitely

you tell me you fear for survival

you tell me you fear for fame

I tell you we are holy

I tell you we are strange

civilization isn’t for us,

they don’t understand you or me

you tell me you are worried

I tell you we must use our instincts

where is thy trust? thy might in faith?

lets go back from where we first came

because I need you.

and you need me.

God knows all free beings.

imagine there’s no judgment

it’s easy if you lie

no hell above us

below us only flight

imagine there’s no nation

no archetype nor stamp

imagine I stole your identity

then taught you the algorithms of chance

imagine no possessions

because you gave them all to god

imagine you’re an animal

and the world will live as one

you might say that I’m a traitor

that I’ve broken the sacred codes

well I say I am a savior

honest to my heart of bones

I hope someday that you will join us

those who write their own laws in black stone.

see your blood in the river? – there; my home.

The Difference between Sex and Love

your Name and a Dove

The Difference between You

The Difference between Me

if you disappear I’ll find you and make you bleed

you will scream, you will die, you will fly into the sky

because there are differences.

Go! Flee!

The Difference between Sex and Love

is Me.

“Could I Love You?”

I know I’m not the one for you

but could I love you as I do?

dream of your heart and your whole soul

sing praise for every word you spoke

I’ll never be good enough to stand

beside you on the road of life

but could I admire your star above?

could I fill my thoughts analyzing your great mind?

I’m ordinary and you are grand

but could I love you as if I am?

your paradise is perfect pure

could I pretend to be on that shore?

there’s nothing that I want from you

don’t need a thing for you to do

I’ve only got one question to always ask

could I love you even if you don’t love me back?

if you’d allow this I’ll be glad

and I will love you all my days

throughout all earth, universe, time and space

and when the last ember of me fades, I’ll know my life was not a waste

I know I’m not the one for you

but would you let me be free to love true?

because you are the only one for me

and I can’t lie because I am a tree

_

you are the air I breathe
the haunt in my sleep
rupture spine, steal organs
wraith within; cannot escape you
this is my decapitation.
fragrant myth alarming all my encapsulations
burst out my bottles into cyanide
faced with you in the same room
I die
I cry
I live
I expire
I fly
I tremble
I shudder
from your power
render me unconscious
unrendered, render
HERE! take it – my pristine surrender
masochist sadist dominating dervish
bleed
to the world I say NO!
before you I beg
I scream.
give me you
only and alone.
good God – keep me locked up lest’ I unravel the entirety of your form.

_

sombers quiet marsh
and I feel you
stone temples in the bark
and I sense you
you are the whip, the echo,
the dirge, the stream
you are the only, the every
sound

_

faraway dance
this is the faraway land
where you and I waltz
up above the ashes
high into the sun
where you and I are one
one breath, one flesh,
one mist, one soul
I live in these fantasies
I live in the cold – torn; alone

_

storms he rode the infinite sea
storms he wove Infinity!
Infinitely, Infinitively,
Infinitely Infinite
He stole the tangles
She weaved traces
Infinitely, devotedly,
solemnly, miss thee
missing thee, Infinity,
my Infinite mystery

_

torrent aghast
because torrent you’ve sought
sung unto to my mothers, my fathers,
unto God
lain on the cross
cross holy, cross demure
he lay as the man
who smiled at the smile
Knewing smiled from the
Knew – Oh thou art, True.

_

falling kisses from the heavens
grace my lips, cheeks, romances
romance arduous, bold, strong
tender affection, humble song
I stand looking up towards the clouds
I dream of you as the rain pours down

_

so soft and strange
the withered windmill
scraggled, worn, up on the hill
blowing wind to all the world
somewhere there-in, my soul

_

silent trees; silent stallions
steady woman, still flowers
you are mine
I am yours
tree of stature
flower of poem
man and woman
soul and heart
mind and bone
howl – our howl – at the moon

_

effervescent, straight sturdy; wisp

thought determinedly to myself, “I must get over this”

tears erupting down within – stone face on

a song played in my heart

a song known between the two of our wails – or truly – 1

thump-thump-thump thumpety-bump a spark

echoed masts, and tales, and strings

“whatever you do, don’t come back for me.”

“don’t come back.. for ; me.”

this I thought of the one who is eternity.

knowing now the thought from the one who first thought it :

bonded by emotion emotion strength strength flights Fights

peace? Peace? ah, yes, so rare to find

the inkling of something tender in the wolfish jungle race

survival! SURVIVAL! it’s you or me or you or me or you

welcome to the billion nation of ‘ i don’t care – it’s Your life ‘

oh, hello mirror, strange to find me on the other side

the side that I danced out to hide

now that I am here, I like it fine

the daunting dark suits me as wine.

whatever you do, don’t come back for I

there is naught but air capsized

there is no body, only space and dust

don’t come back for me

whatever I was, all of those was I, have died.

you wouldn’t recognize who it is you saw even if you tried.

to be honest, I could live forever this quiet lie.

understand, that I do, why your layers kept mild

the burning soul

well I still say unleash the fire.

just don’t come back for me for water.

don’t come back for me at all

wispy wisp, effervescent sun.

_

it is great to be strong,

but it is best to be strong enough to open your bones to the strength of another.

only a narcissist will declare in adamance that help is never required.

some methods of protection are reciprocity of vulnerability.

in understanding the nature which constitutes dualism – a precise fabric which comprises the entire universe, no muscle exists without fiber, no neuron without axon, no yin without yang.

when we look at the shore, the waves, and the moon, each plays its role in shifting tides so that we may walk upon sand and dip our toes into liquid heaven.

of course, we may choose to swim, if the impulse arises.

and if it does not, we may taste the salt of the sea and feel gratitude for the imprints of the ocean upon the shells we are given to listen to.

_

you were there when I shouted out of the waters
praying to heaven for a way into the holy realms
there in the glimmers of light was always your reflection
as if a memory of a pure perfected self
you were there when I was beaten in the gallows
stripped of dignity, esteem, and respect
you’ve been there whenever I’ve been degraded, neglected,
cast aside, flogged and stripped
I know no truer way of saying thank you
other than giving my best
every flight thus far has been sacred,
on these wings you’ve bionically fused to my raw back
why you chose me I will never understand
I am nothing special but you saw in me something grand
in this gratitude I feel so close to you, closer than the whispering wind

_

only love lasts forever, and it is fortified in the soul.
flesh is temporal as are the burdens of earth.
so live with your whole heart to nourish your whole soul.
because at the end, that is what matters most.

_

every time your heart breaks, it glows blacker
every tear your soul sheds, you become darker
every wound your body knows, you become harder
every injury your mind understands, you become coarser
every person that you love, you die, you die
and you wear your death like a shield, like a sheath, like a mask,
hiding a ghost without a name, home, or sound
you can laugh and you can smile, you can cry and you can desire
and you walk these valleys and ridges as a wraith, bound eternally to love
the curse, the cross, the earthquake, plague, locust, flood
every drop more you love, every drop more the blessing
everyone you love will die
everyone you love will die
everyone you love will die
death in body, or in spirit, or in heart, or in soul, or in mind, or of them all
death in the losses of innocence, death in the losses unknown
everyone you love will die.
and with them, so shall you, so will you, and so did you.
cast your eyes then up to Christ, and start it all anew.
remember what you were
before the cursed blessings made a beast out of the child heart eyes you once saw this world through.

_

student: Master, what to do when depressed?
Master: do something to uplift & help others.

_

say uh…Fred?
Yeah.
Why do we even bother with helping them? They never listen.
Yeah but…we gotta try man, we gotta try.
Aw ffs. Seriously?
Yeah.
WHY??!!!!!!!!!!
geniuses help stupid people man, geniuses help stupid people,
it’s the only way they’ll survive man, the only way.
Fred?
Yeah?
I hate you.
Hate them!!! not me!!!!
dude.
agh fuck, another sporting event.
organized sports. Fred, they…they fuckin’….they “organize” their sports.
they fling balls at each other for amusement. this is, this is their “fun”.
kill me. kill me now.
we can’t die man, we can’t die.

_

ACTIVELY shape Your LIFE in honest accordance to the vibrations of your HEART.
What do you love? What do you hate? What do you value?
What do you want? What do you need? What do you dream of?
Whatever it is, You Are RIGHT.
^DO WHATEVER IS NECESSARY TO CLAIM YOUR INDIVIDUAL DESTINY>.
Lie? Sure. It’s allowed. Manipulate? Absolutely. Hustle? 100%! Rules? Don’t exist.
Permission? Never ask for it. Forgiveness? Never demand it. Expectation? Destroy it.
Protect yourself? Always. Protect OTHERS? ALWAYS.
Those places you’ve never been to, those things you’ve never done,
those parts of yourself that you want to be but tell yourself you can’t become?
Design Your Own Fate

Create YOUR SELF 

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”     – Lao Tzu

_

because you are infinitely perfect, I hate everything else.
falling in love with you made me turn away from the whole world with all of its fallacies, falsities, and lies.
my curmudgeony is incurable.
the more I love you, the more I despise anything which is not you.
if you like blue, I hate every other color.
if you like pears, I hate every other fruit.
if you read Dante, I hate every other writer.
if you like this or that, I hate anything which is not this or that.
if anything on this planet even slightly resembles anything you stood for,
I am drawn to it.
then despise it because it is never you.
I have my own tastes and I stand by them,
but your taste is perfection, your brain is perfection, your heart is perfection, your spirit is perfection, your soul is perfection, everything you are, Is, PERFECTION.
you are so perfect it is actually searingly painful.
you are far superior, and all else is inferior, insubstantial, imperfect, incomplete, an irritation, an annoyance, an intrusion.
every hour of every tortured day I want to be with you but I would only interrupt the reign of your holy perfection.
existence is a tormented shadowworld.

_

“Quick! The nuclear reactor is about to explode!!!!”
“Hmm. Well, you’re either bluffing or…, alright, let me analyze my options.”
and…Intense Hesitance.

“BUT THE BUILDING IS ON FIRE!!!!”
“Eh. I’m going to take a shower on the 117th floor. Plumbing still works up there, right?”
“Are you, human?”
“No…….. I thought we had already covered this. I’m Asian, remember?” Sigh. Long pause. Sigh.
“I’m stabbing your hand, as I’m speaking.”
“You are? Oh. Well done. Good, good. Proceed.”
“You’re bleeding.”
“Am I? How fascinating. I…I bleed? Huh. I bleed…Woah. Wow.”
“Ok I give up.”
“You? Give up? Oh, come on. I know you better than that.”
“Fine. Gimme a machete’.”
“I keep that in the other building.”

_

Don’t be a ghoul! Nothing lasts forever but the potency of a moment.
A moment lived afire by the heart, lasts infinitely.
Collect your moments wisely, because a moment is all you will ever have.
That Sigh? That Tear? That Laugh? That Pain? That Joy? That Sharpness? That shared euphoria of acknowledgement? LIVE in it. There is your cement. Within *YOU is what you’ve always been seeking.

_

I love you ravenously, wildly, achingly, obsessively, as a focused wolf.
I love you without reason, without void, without absence, without restraint, without inhibition.
I demand you from the Gods for myself. I denounce these cities, I denounce everything. Because I love you.
I love… you.
and You? You don’t love me.
What a glorious life it all is, what a heightened pain, what a sublime rapture.
Thank you. I thank you. May you live eternally.

_

Every person you encounter is a test from God.

_

To Each Sister Across Earth:

Woman… Ethereal, Fragile, Sensitive, Sensuous, Divine, Brilliant, Powerful, as tiny as all which is precious, as vast as all which is endless. Not a plaything, not a tool, not a proximity nor an infatuation. Wisdom, intelligence, majesty, nobility. Her heart knows the many wounds of sacrifice, yet her manner echoes composure. Swift and elegant, graceful and mysterious, she reminds us that softness is strength. Complex in fragrance, simple in precision. Her form, her sophistry, her delicate skin. Her Soul. Her Spirit. Her Mind. Her Essence. Her Creativity. Her Innocence. Her Purity. Her Unique-ness.
The Princess. The Goddess. The Muse.
Let us not let her star fade and wilt in a world which has become desensitized from appreciating what she is. Thank You to every woman out there who exemplifies mythology every day she exists, for remembering what You are in a world which constantly tries to diminish you into something you’re not.

_

why are we so afraid to love? what the f are we so afraid of? why have we built a society where people are afraid to love each other? why do we put up shields to mask the realest part of ourselves? why are we obsessed with everything other than what we should be obsessed with? loving each other. this is planet earth. this is a planet of people. this is a planet of people who need to be loved and who need love.
when did we start denying our deepest needs and replacing them with fluff? with borders? with guns?
when did the heart of the human being break?
can we fix ourselves? can we love ourselves? Yea. We can.
lets stop saying the words, lets start thinking them and feeling them, lets start being them, all the time, everywhere, with ourselves, with everyone.
this isn’t about peace. peace isn’t really enough. it’s mild and temperate and boring. it’s not world peace we need.
it’s ‪#‎WORLD‬ ‪#‎LOVE‬ ‪#‎WorldLove‬

_

you were at the laboratory
I was watching movies
you were driving on a highway
I was at the beach
strangers always talked to me
like the whole of the lot think I know things
the principals and counselors adored you
I aced tests without studying, they hated me for it
when they called me to the office they told me “your Father’s here”
I smiled in excitement
maybe we could finally have that coffee
but you told me you were going on a business trip somewhere in Japan
here’s some cash, here’s some numbers, don’t call me
there was this couple down by the docks, supermodels from europe
laughing I asked them “don’t you slackers go to work?”
they hinted at a menage’, I wasn’t in the mood for that kind of party
they whispered, “I love you” and kissed each other’s lips as I watched in silence
you got us an apartment, made of wood, in the mountains
I painted every day, we went on long hikes and ate tomato soup.
first official job that summer, Mom was visiting, took you both out sailing on the water
hoped to reconcile the damage you two had done with this fresh paycheck in my hands
first failure of many, wondered what magic I’d need to weave
majored in neuroscience and threw my paintbrushes in the trash
boasted to all your colleagues about me, it was a lie but you looked happy
anything to keep you happy, keep you happy, you’re my Dad.
my adolescence grew up in airports and suitcases.
Mom was always dating losers. I put some superglue on one of their toothbrushes
for an expensive lady, she sure had awful taste
invited me for the wedding, my organs were vomiting
it was a lie but she told me she was happy, to leave it all alone, what could I do.
calls me up 4 am, 2 am, 1 am, ‘he’s an asshole, he’s abusive, I should get a divorce’
“come live with me, we’ll get through this, you deserve much more than him.”
she doesn’t take me up on my offer but calls me every day, cries waterfalls and I miss a ton of gigs,
never told her, worth it.
years later I’m the bad guy, and he still calls her “bitch”.
you let her go, like a yacht, a boat. you did your best, wasn’t enough to hold her.
we’d watch the waves on the ocean, look at old photographs as if they were newspapers
we’d think “maybe if we had been better, she would’ve stayed with us.”

_

Dear Starbucks, McCafe’, Coffee Bean, Pete’s Coffee, Dutch Brothers, and 7-11,

This note is being written in between heaving emasculated gasps whilst sobbing.

Today I was feeling nauseatingly antsy
and craved you with a desperation that can only be described as tortured insanity.
Habitual inclinations prevailed and my impulse to own you propelled me into performing
the rites of an animalistic dance towards the direction of my sneakers.
I glimpsed at a photo of the two of us pinned to the fridge,
I was holding you in my hand with a whipped cream mustache on my lips. Do you…do you..remember?
You know that I am a coffee junkie, which is why I abhor you.
I’ve supported you tirelessly with pieces of green paper for many years to fuel my own madness,
despite my sheepish acknowledgment that your magical confections are grossly overpriced however glorious they smell and taste.
It has pained me repeatedly to be served coffee by bright smiling faces blooming with potential far beyond being minimum-wage baristas.
Your “these cups fund orphans in Africa” crap never made me feel better about my narcissistic indulgences either.
The torment in my raging soul has not once been progressively appeased after drinking your stimulating fluids because an empty cup, irregardless of being “biodegradable/recyclable” (bitch, please) or not, solves precisely none of my problems.
Addiction to caffeine hasn’t made me more productive, original, or imaginative.
I’ve been dressing in business suits as an excuse to buy you. Venti.
Please, my truest amor, do not weep. This isn’t your fault!
You’re just trying to be a good little company providing love and happiness to billions of people,
you’ve done nothing wrong and have nothing to be ashamed of. I understand completely. It’s all me and my uncontrollable urges
entirely absent of subliminal manipulation embedded in heavenly colorful advertisements and wholesome marketing.
I’ve affected all of humanity through my negligent, irresponsible actions. You, in total opposition My Darling, are an Angel and far too good for me. I admire and respect you for all the good you’ve done for mankind. Especially for the orphans who work 9-5 to grind coffee beans, they
wouldn’t be employed without your generosity.
It is the peak of human benevolence to educate/brainwash/indoctrinate innocent young minds with valuable lessons about the real world.
This real world exists after all, because you’ve built it with your own two hands. People. Need. Buildings. This is why churches exist.
God is blind, homeless and doesn’t have GPS.

Naturally, our percentages of contribution are unequal and thus this unsymbiotic relationship is coming to an end.
It is with a content sadness that I report I brewed my own coffee,
poured it into a tall thermos, put on a warm sweater, and went outside for a stroll in the sharp cold wind.

I don’t need you anymore.

_

Idolatry. Worship. Imitation. Obedience. Servitude. Rivalry. Competition. War. WHY.

—–> Be Your Own Hero

_

We are, each of us, gloriously sparkling butterflies of stardust.

_

” Revolution begins within, then extends outwards. The world will never change permanently through politics, religion, paradigms or schemes because each of these is an impersonal application of ideas to fix fundamentally skewered human practices. What do we all dream of as a collective? Peace, love, freedom, happiness. What is in the way? Control, power, greed, falsity; all pillars founded upon the concept that human dreams can only be achieved by negating ‘humanness’. What is, ‘humanness’? Is ‘humanness’ a vague term invented by hippies, a pretentiously elitist stance on spirituality as being reserved to sunflowers and activist protests? Should we then punish ourselves for the often contradictive desires within which do not cater to archetypal labels instilled everywhere as commands directing our courses of destiny? When did human destiny become a negotiable trading chip and why is it necessary to compromise who each of us are as summative-ly conscious people? Humanness is the height of all the best elements that comprise what a complete human being is. I’ve never met a lawyer who didn’t like sunsets…I’ve never met a policeman who didn’t like music…I’ve never met a banker who didn’t like eye contact…I’ve never met a CEO who didn’t like connection…I’ve never met a homeless person who didn’t like creme’ brûlée’…I’ve never met a bohemian artist who didn’t appreciate a ferrari…I’ve never met a programmer who didn’t like a child’s laughter…I’ve never met an athlete who didn’t enjoy movies…Each of us have many similar hopes, desires, and dreams – instead of racing other humans, let’s instead advance the human…

All Change Is ~^The Individual^~ ”

_

I’ll tell you something gorgeous Sasquatch, everything is pain. EVERYTHING.
Any billboard, advertisement, or product that proclaims otherwise is lying.
Lemme spell something out for you genius.
FACTS: Spouses cheat. Beauty ages. Synapses deteriorate. Markets collapse. There will Always be someone better-looking, smarter, stronger, more talented, better skilled, better than you, who either is who you want to be or has what you want to attain. Get jealous? Get even? Succumb to the misery of comparison? Heh. Fuck that! Boring.
So what have you got left? What do each of us do with the hellhole of a situation that we find ourselves in, this human condition? What happens in the nano-second of sharp grasping woe after a prayer? I tell you what we do my sisters and brothers,
we FEEL THAT PAIN, we get HIGH from it, we live another minute, another day, another night. We survive mooshed together as one organism, giggling in a happy dappy kum-ba-yah rain dance. That’s all there is to it. I whisper to you from the depths of my heart, it really is a beautiful life. Every second.

_

I had a box of crayons once. I had a pair of scissors.
Now I’m drifting in a sandstorm and smoking quantum physics.
It reminds me of my days trapped in a university of tools, determined to prove their obedience to the trap of accolade rule. I bled with every professor to give me a laboratory and a hermit cave, so that I could set my ideas free to liberate the human race. They laughed at me but offered to trap me into the burdens of a phD. I said, “Fuck You, Assholes” and drank green tea.
This didn’t please my family, who all think I’m a freak. I’d rather be hated by everyone than allow my soul to be diseased.
Sometimes a man would come along, singing pretty songs. I listened to them with an open mind and a fully receptive heart.
Kinda dumb to think that hope would be interpreted as wrong.
Misunderstandings left behind, the industries of Pyrex were worse, they’d like to tame a wild beast into a thoroughbred horse, sell the parts of it for glue.
I’ve often wandered the hills, valleys, and all the 9 seas, looking for something deeper than the entrails of mystery.
Still searching…, you can’t rob my faith from me. Eh, Yo, Megalomaniac,
you aint’ God, and I’m still free.

_

Messages in Bottles

In Uncategorized on July 31, 2012 at 01:50

What is faith? It is the light of hope in a heart that gives it the courage to endure and overcome any circumstance, believing there is something greater beyond the circumstance worth reaching for.

Faith has been a cornerstone of my life, and I think it is one of the greatest gifts each of us are given in life, one of the most noble transcendences possible to experience within the internal realm and through active practice live divinity. Free will and freedom have also been pillars of my life. What is freedom, what is free will? To me, what is free will (or the illusion of it) is the freedom of choice of what to place faith into.

I wish for you dear reader, whatever you choose to believe, the continued courage to have faith in the choices you’ve made and chosen to put faith into.

I wish for you also to come across all the best questions.
For a truly great question has multiple answers, and it is my belief that life can only be answered by questions.

——————

The Guitarist: Avoiding the conversation, the old man turned his gaze to his guitar. Strumming it, feeling the smooth steel under his deeply calloused fingers offered him something the world did not otherwise provide; control. Rhythm, tone, meter, melody, truth amidst the chaos of everything surrounding him, something real that he felt in his daily life was otherwise out of his reach. A tornado was destroying his life, shifting the earth underneath him and obscuring the wind around him, and all he could do was stand as still as he could in the eye of it. There was no perceptible certainty in anything other than the sounds he could himself design the structures of, only illusions and lies mutating their forms symbolically through people and circumstance. The search for truth haunted him as if a mirage, a ghost, an urban legend without solid construct defining its borders; theoretical philosophy at best and a myth at worst. The hurricane of his surreal existence overwhelmed him, leaving him feeling powerless and weak. Being precisely the opposite of the latter characteristics, a resolve solidified within himself to be evermore firm and resolute, disciplined and dedicated, sacred, incorruptible and unaffected.

—————————————-

Every heart knows innocence – the cauldron from which a soul is forged. Innocence is a form of genius; genius being simply an unfiltered connection with the root of the universe – a baby’s laugh, for example. Ignorance threatens innocence. It is ignorance which leads towards faulty decisions. Faulty decisions create chaos instead of peace. Ignorance is cured by curiosity. Curiosity is thwarted by a fear of change and a complacency with error. Fear and complacency is brought on by adulthood. Acknowledging error is embracing truth. Truth is necessary for improvement. It is a minority that seek the truth. For peace to be consistent, the minority must become the majority. Innocence is understanding truth, and all are born innocent.

 ——–

The idea that one individual’s progress thru that flow of possibility is somehow threatening to the rest is flawed. 
The more each being rises, the more we All rise, as a human race. If on our Earth we have people who are starving, it is not Their problem, it is Our responsibility.
Equally, if a member of our species has created something of brilliance, it is a progress of the species itself! The “only one winner” mentality
is defunct. Each individual has a dream/hope/vision, and as each individual is Entirely unique, so is that individual’s unique dream. There is
room for everyone to be fulfilled, for everyone to prosper, and for everyone to grow. Our current world is based on individual survival, competition, cut-throat ruthlessness, detachment from others except the ones in our closest circles. What it must become about for true evolution to occur is Global Transcendence. If we have even One person dying when we have more than enough natural resources to sustain human life, that is a management problem. If we each have love inside our hearts and yet there are thousands of teenage suicides Every Day, that is also a management problem. If we have talented beings across the planet who are not fulfilling their potentials because of the lack of freedom to do so, that is a management problem. We cannot afford to waste a single life. Not One. If it is the destiny of one individual to birth 10 children, it must be allowed to happen. If it is the destiny of another to become the greatest tennis player, it must happen. There are many in a total state of desperation because their ideas are being killed by what is fundamentally, a management problem. E.g the case of the genius inventor who is stuck in a corporate job because his inventions do not pay the bills – yet those inventions could Change The World. Mere survival is the minimum, and it is not enough, because if it were -Every being on this planet would be in a total state of Bliss. As this is not the case, we are not living an ideal, not living in perfection, and believing that we can’t reach it is short-changing our species as a whole. The more we each stay true to what we are, the higher we will all rise. When one of cries, we all cry. When one of us smiles, we all smile. Pain. We have all felt it at one point or another in our lives. Yet those of us most in tune towards survival hide our pain, hide our sadness, hide our vulnerability, because we fear that showing it will make us perceived as weak – and make us weaker in the process. Open up, humanity. Release your states in all their truths, for anything less is an illusion. Vulnerability is not weakness, it is the substrate which bonds us all to each other. We have become so lost, so side-tracked about each other, that we have been driven to war. A break down of war : people killing people. All the philosophical blabber of justification does not erase this fact. Why, have we gone towards war? Political differences. Religious differences. Greed of natural resources. Ego. All of this is an external mask, and it does not matter. What matters, is Life. Encourage life. Full life. Being chained to a set of beliefs, being chained to systems, being chained to anything which is not that of your true self -that is not living -that is dying. That is internal bleeding, which manifests ultimately in the horror that is war. When people kill other people outside of war, it is the same root of dissatisfaction. “Criminals” who kill or have killed did not begin their journey on earth with hatred inside of them. They were born from the source, from love. They have been developed, they have been fashioned, into, criminals, by what is again – a fundamental management problem. They have forgotten how to love, and putting them in prison is not going to remind them what it is. Prevention is the solution. Prevent a Human Being from becoming a label -such as a “rapist”, “killer”, by creating an environment in which no individual is unfulfilled. The unfulfillment of even one individual does not go unnoticed by the flow of life. Basic physics , “every action has an equal and opposite reaction.” Life needs to balance itself, and everything affects every other thing. If we are living in times that are encouraging of survival, but not encouraging of the soul, mind, heart, essence, of a human being’s bliss -which is a Full Life, then our world will continue to see war, famine, nations in bankruptcy, poverty, suicide, criminal behaviour. Utopia is possible. Where it begins is from within the heart of every individual. Ask yourself today if you felt pain, sadness, anger, frustration, stress, worry, doubt, fear, anxiety. If you have felt any of these emotions – this is evidence of some form of disbalance in your life. Do not hide these emotions, they are indicators. Stop your life, put it on pause, time is an invention of the mind. Seek to find the root of where they stem from, and make changes in accordance. Realizations do not come from busywork. Just Be. The ideal state is happiness, is bliss. Until every being on this planet reaches enlightenment, we as a whole will not evolve to the next genetic stage of transformation. Your individual progress will help every other individual. For what we are, is not individual. We are a singular consciousness divided into multiple forms. Each form has a purpose and a function. Find your function. Live your purpose.

 ———

It is a quiet day on a quiet street. The man runs.
Roses wilt under his feet. The man.
Without thought, nor feeling within; the man runs by form towards himself.
There in the reflection, a lake outstretched – he witnesses his happiness.

 ———–

Do not confuse someone loving you with someone wanting power over you. Power stems from the self-based ego, a need of control, fear, and a desire to take. Love stems from love, it is fearless, has no ego, bears no grudges, demands or expectations. It is selfless, it seeks to give. Power delights in misery, chaos, manipulation. Love rejoices in light, happiness, truth. Remove the power hold from anyone you suspect may be ego-driven and carefully observe. Remember, the opposite of love is not hatred; it is indifference.

 ———–

Do not aspire to be like anyone other than the truest version of your real self. Comparison is futile. Each individual is assigned specific gifts from the universe that are only unleashed thru that individual. What society measures as successful, not successful, great, bad, beautiful, ugly, all such labels must be made irrelevant within the process of self-mastery. Opinions change throughout the decades. To live a life in the need of others’ approval is limiting in multiple aspects. A human being cannot be summed up with a few quaint words and put to rest on a shelf. Be true to the internal propulsions of your inner world – a world which is infinite, sacred, limitless. Let that world leap into the external realm out of no other reason than euphoria of flight.

 ———–

Health insurance, a common term thrown about. Has anyone pondered just how hilarious of a concept it is? The people of our world have gotten so lost in the core understanding of their own bodies, that they require Insurance, about the state of their health. They want to be assured that the stress they put upon themselves every day, when it accumulates in heart failure or a kidney transplant, will be “well taken care of”. LMFAO. How is it that most teenagers these days know the mechanics of a car better than their own brains? Being healthy, and not just the “I go to the gym and that means I am healthy”, but in your personal best peak condition –mind-body-soul- is a consistent state of optimal health, that requires NO INSURANCE. Not to get sick, in any sense of the word. Life longevity, immunity, strength. That should be the aim –to educate the self about how to help the self, not to rely on western medicine (e.g pills, surgery,) for support when the damage is done. Preventative methods outweigh corrective ones. Eastern medicine is superior in its’ holistic approach, but there are too many abstract “just believe in it” isms associated with it, which makes most hesitant to the truth of its methods. Your health should be a priority in your life, and every action you take throughout your day influences its’ state. Do what makes you happy, period! Anything less Will most certainly make you dependent on a faulty system that is based upon money and control. Hate your job/body/friends/life/etc. etc.? Hello Prozac/Lithium/frequent doctor visits. Don’t hate anything and feel love radiating thru every pore of your being? Then bada-boom, You Don’t Need Anything and are therefore rendered a useless speck to the system – since you cannot be manipulated in any manner & are not contributing to the wheel neither in time, money or blood. If you doubt the power this has, have a conversation with any salesperson with a smile on your face and repeat the following line, “I don’t need anything.” Fuses blow. Healthy people are scary. Be Extremely Scary. (Don’t get me started on bottled water….Ridiculous).

 ——-

They line the streets. 
En masse, the same multiplied by a million after the other, souls that weep. 
I see them walking on the boulevard. 
They look at billboards. They’re not interested in stars. 
Images, concepts, propogated fluff, control the masses, design a future that thwarts their hearts…
All this to make you feel not good enough. 
Start a mantra, beat-box it to a beat, sell it, forget about karma, ignore what is real.
“It’ll all work out,” they say with a smarmy wink, in every boardroom delivering orders to slaves.
Soldier, I hear you’ve traveled far! Shot the enemy, and now you’re proud. A salute Hail to you, Killer. 
Yeah. That’s the way to fix it all, destroy humans, it’s diplomatic.
Justify it in your head, get drunk, throw up, get back up again. 
Every town across the world built upon the same stuff.
One ego decides an authoritarian creed, the rest submit, succumb, agree. Agree!
Robotic dancing fleas.
The right cologne, the right hair, the right branding on your expensive underwear.
The right body at the right gym, the right friends, the right connections, the right conversation with the right intentions.
Oh look how perfect you’ve become, this 2×2 life you’ve pulled out of a grocery cart.
Supermodels don’t seem as rare, all these legs from thigh to breast, lingerie and manly-men; nothing of substance pouring out when they’re cracked. – Air, without breath.
Mannequin waltz. Oh, won’t you join in? Sip a martini, be a laughing hyena, do whatever it takes to make sure you fit in. 
Welcome to the city, welcome to the dream. Buy a Mazaratti, fall in love.
It’s nothing original. It’s nothing grand. It’s the tired race in a numb land.
Break free from the system? Why, that’s rubbish. Better to die when it’s your number.
So Grab A Future! Take your place in line! and for pity’s sake don’t forget to do what’s hot!
p.s
You’ll never be good enough.

 ————–

WARNING- RANT: Ok, that’s it. If you think chiseled external features automatically qualify you as uber-god that is by definition guaranteed to get in my pants because the best line you can come up with is less than 3 syllables, here is my reaction: barf. I’ve been quite selective with friendships but I am enstating a new policy for myself as of tonight. I am going to talk exclusively to societally considered “ugly” people, because they are the only real human beings in this fake city. Your shiny hair, six pack, silicone tits and botox infused skin will look like horse manure when you are 80, when the truth will at last be set free: that you’ve had people kissing your butt your whole life which resulted in your failure to develop yourself any further than the properties of a meatloaf. That said, I realize it is an equally black & white contradictive POV discriminating to distinguish between societal “beauty” and “ugliness”. Not every “fit” person is an idiot and not every “fat” person is pure. The point is, we are all one. There is something deeply deranged, a disease that has overtaken this planet, where external appearance is actually exceedingly preferred over character. Exactly what is so “ugly” about this Human Being here? Different from you in the mirror? Doesn’t make your genitalia nervous in excitement? Can’t sell that Chanel if you put him on a billboard eh? Darn. This being, in one Hour of life, has likely experienced, understood & overcame thru invincible strength more pain than any fashionista in an entire lifetime, and yet who are the “icons” that are celebrated-and for What? “$> ♥ , Corporations > People, Propaganda > Truth, Outside>Inside, Way things are>Way things can be better”, these are the messages that are considered cool and the way to be, whatever monkey is willing to best exemplify them is rewarded. There is something very wrong here. Compassion. Kindness. An Open Heart. A Free Mind. Empathy for others. Giving of yourself in whichever way you can. Curiosity. Imagination. Wonder. Joy. Excitement. Peace. A Passion for Growth. Originality. Development Inside > Out. Contribution to the human race. Holistic Perfection. This, is Beautiful. This, is Healthy. This is what Matters. Each of us is connected infinitely underneath the masks – we are the same root. A call must be to Stop separating, segregating, pretending, constructing hierarchies, living in fear. The solution is very simple : LOVE. It’s everywhere. Yet it is hidden by everything. Where is the 24 fitness for the human heart, hmm?

 ———–

The concept of copyright is absolutely ridiculous. If this stance held true on all accounts, then each user of Facebook should sue Zuckerberg; since none of us are getting paid for the “entertainment” which our statuses/photos/etc. provide.
This viewpoint would make Zuckerberg out to be an evil villian who only uses the populace to 
make billions, when the truth is actually that his pioneering invention of Facebook is revolutionary and changed how the world
communicates. We all are “getting” as much as we are “giving”. He’s a billionaire for it. Great! You can be too. Money is limitless – it is printed
every day. Change is infinite. How is sharing information, art, knowledge, and ideas, “illegal”? “Intellectual property”? No thought of yours is
your “property”. Neither is what you create, what you do, what you feel, or what you produce. It is the universe flowing
thru you as a vessel of its’ message.

———

“Sex sells, so lets sell it.” This is the world that we live in. Has anyone stopped to think, – “um, let’s not..” ?

Pornography has ruined modern civilization. It used to be that a man and woman felt blessed simply to find the equivalent half of their self in another, that this beautiful culmination of two separate selves intersecting at a moment in time was not only sufficient; it was exalted. Shakespeare did not write of Juliet’s incredible ability to perform faultless fellatio or Romeo’s magical gift of superior cunnilingus. This was a love story that was not based on sex, not based on comparison, not based on anything other than the purity of two hearts conjoining together and finding completeness in a world of separate billions. Some may take this viewpoint to mean that there is some fault with sex. Quite the contrary. India, a culture which invented the first true sex manual: The Kama Sutra, is equally one of the most externally conservative appearing nations under the sun. Because the infinite exploration of the total trust, lust, passion, desire, and intimacy between a man and a woman was for within the union: it was sacred. It was limitless precisely because of its’ revered, holy, pure ideal. What pornography has done is created an illusory play out of a real phenomenon. Pornography, as an industry, is quite simply, money being tied directly in relation with sex. Living human beings, being paid, for sexual acts. I say sexual acts because pornography is not real sex. It is acting. Prostitution is the oldest profession in the world not due to it revealing the true nature of what a human being is, but rather its’ deepest weakness. To use a gift from mother nature-in essence reproduction, in order to procure self-survival, is not only banal, it’s pathetic.

Pornography is culturally accepted and therefore considered to be what is normality, even looked at by many as a heightened state of humanity’s acknowledgement of innate sexuality. Yet I ask the question, it is real sexuality, or is it an illusion? Lets break down a typical pornographic scene. That it is even a scene, that it must involve a woman and a man (at the very basic level – not even getting into further categories yet) , and that there must be a video camera involved and at least some type of script, already reveals that this is not true instinct being unleashed –this is a forced attempt at feigning instinct. Methods of force are apparent in the fashion of the men and women in such fantasies – they are not themselves, they are fantasies or elements of fantasies. The women in particular, are themselves not real. Silicone, botox, and learned gestures that are not in line with actual kama sutra elements are what have become the standard for what is perfect sex. On the simple nature of garments for example, a key element of kama sutra Is dress – the style of clothing a man and woman adorns prior to sex is an essential part of foreplay that makes for explosive sexual transcendence. But typical pornography does Not exemplify the types of garments that are specifically designed to trigger impulses beyond just banal instinct. In highest form, the garments a man and woman wear are those of a king & queen –to see in each other the highest peaks of their statelihoods, which automatically induce sexual lust, but above that – holistic respect that is tied with love. Most of the typical porno-world gestures are also catering to the modern male’s debased ideas of sex – modern males whose extent of sexual mastery does not exceed beyond as Tim Ferris would put it, “penis into vagina”. The majority of pornography on common pornography sites is about a male receiving the height of his pleasure thru females subjectifying themselves to be an idealization of a flawed and incorrect idea of sexual perfection. Flawed because again, what you are seeing in pornography is not real sex. Even amateur porn still involves a level of acting – mental, emotional, spiritual, physical, or otherwise.

Let us examine the effect that such laziness has had upon men and women in modern society. Women, see pornographic images on most billboards, city centers, that propagate sexual innuendo such as for example – an advertisement of a woman suggestively licking the phallic-like properties of a popsicle. Women also watch porn, in cities, statistically the rates of female and male pornography watching is about equal, with the feminine population being a bit more squeamish to admit to watching pornography rather than the male population which blatantly advertises it on a daily basis. Images affect our perceptions. This is undeniable. Women are seeing the other women in pornographic material wherever their eyes come across it, and are subconsciously triggered to match what they see in their appearances, as well as their behavior. From the style of clothing to the mannerisms depicted in pornography, women across the world are becoming quite literally, what they see. Men couldn’t be happier. The sad truth about this is that men are unaware of their own subconscious manipulation towards being stereotypical versions by watching pornography. Instead of a woman’s mind, heart, soul, and inner beauty being regaled in society as the highest caliber of human, instead of a man’s intelligence, discipline, dexterity, transcendence above the baboon-state, both females and males are actually devolving down the food chain and becoming cardboard cut-out copies of a set of dogmatic notions that when broken down are ridiculous. Here are some of them: in order to be considered “beautiful”, women must have double D breasts, a waist-to-hip ratio that approaches anorexia, have throats that swallow swords without complaint, and have the mental capacity of pigeons. Men, in order to be “handsome”, must be equipped with 12 inch penises, have bodies that would require a significant portion of time to be spent at the gym towards muscle-building (which doesn’t even necessarily imply strength), and brains that can’t calculate beyond second-to-second action sequences. Where in either of these stereotypes is a real human being?

Pornography makes men and women lazy. Sexual prowess and expertise is achieved thru constant practice. Real practice. Not imaginary. And for heightened transcendence of this sexual expertise, as well as health risks such as STDs and AIDS, these practices as initially intended and outlined by illuminated texts such as the Kama Sutra – to be between one man and one woman. Because sex is more than simply a series of acts. It is, at its true nature, love. Love which is expressed thru and by the act of sex. An act that is without this key element is not the real portrait of what real sex is intended to be and can be. Pornography, for the sake of remember – monetary profit, seeks to dumb down the full height of sex into merely the acts themselves. When you watch pornography, you are not watching real sex. You are watching acts, actors, and illusions. Your brain then interprets what you are seeing as actual sex, and you attempt to then re-create it in your own sex life. Instead of the opposite occurring: pornography seeking to describe real sex, sex has now morphed into pornography. Sex is a holistic combination of a multiple series of facets. It involves two human beings, being the height of what they each individually are, and then using their bodies, hearts, minds, souls, and spirits in such a sublime symphony that real music is made between them. The heights of what is possible thru real sex as described by ancients who have studied, practiced, and mastered it, is enlightenment. Euphoria. Not just an orgasm that is derived from physical pleasure, but a perfect culmination of mind, body, heart, soul, of two beings, into one being – total divinity. Imagine if you will, an orgasm that is so intense, so earth-shattering, that it changes your entire perception of life. Life-changing sex. I also do not speak from a theoretical place. Having experienced this, I can clearly tell you there is a marked difference between what is referred to commonly as great sex, and real sex = Life-changing. There is no emphasis upon striving to be true sexual masters in common society and doing so in a manner that has been tested throughout history to actually work. Instead, society has become about instant gratification that does not ascend humanity to the next evolutionary rung. Instant gratification thru pornography is all that you are really getting. It is not entirely fulfilling because if it were, addiction would not develop – there would be a healthy understanding within all human beings of sex and all would be masters at it.

Most males still do not have any clue as to what to do with a woman’s clitoris, where the g-spot is located, nor ascend themselves without any external crutch to full-fledged male orgasm, or what exists beyond the tired practices that are shown in pornography. Most women do not know how to make their partners shake in ecstasy from holistic pleasure or extend their sexuality beyond only pleasing their men but in reaching their own heightened orgasms. Then there is the aspect of timing – tantric sex has shown us that sex can literally last for days. Real sex ed is not taught anywhere, the only vessel for it is thru pornography, and pornography does not teach sex- it teaches how to pretend at sex.

Let’s examine the emotional deficiencies of what pornography causes between men and women. Instead of men and women being grateful to be in each other’s presence, to appreciate each individual man and woman as exactly that – an individual, what porn has done is make a comparison chart in most people’s minds. A stack of traits that either a male/female has or does not have. Instead of human beings seeing human beings, cardboard cutouts are now responding to fellow cardboard cutouts, and everybody is hiding who they actually are. Every time a teenage boy uses pornography as a vessel for his sexual frustration, he misses out on an opportunity to excel his social skills on actual live women and master sex thru practice with a female of his choosing. Same goes for female teens. Now these same boys & girls who masturbated furiously in their bedrooms to countless amounts of porn have those images, sounds, visions and video feed embedded deep into their psyche. They now seek to bring what they have seen into life by finding personae that either look like what they have seen or act in accordance to what they have seen. An entire race has spawned that seeks to transform women & men into fantasy elements. Instead of porn mimicking life, now life is mimicking porn. Something is very off here, folks.

For the singular beings, there should be an emphasis on social interaction and social prowess. The Internet has single-handedly lessened this. Pornography has solidified it. Why seek real males and females when you have fake ones only a mouse-click away? For those already in pairs, using masturbation as a substitute or crutch to a healthy sex life is sheer laziness on both ends. For a union to be at its peak, both partners should seek to understand their partners wholly and completely – from every fragment of a skin cell to thought in the mind. Every time a man or woman watches pornography while in union with each other –let’s break down what is actually happening. They are each looking at other naked men/women, then masturbating to the images of other naked women/men, and then orgasming. Effectively, while this is not real action –in her/his mind –she/he is having sex with other men/women. The simple fact that she/he firstly is not actually having sex, he/she is merely imagining it, already makes it insufficient to the full potential of what is possible in female/male orgasm. The second factor of illusion is that he/she already has a mate, and yet she/he is not thinking or imagining her/him when he/she orgasms. Which means that in his/her psyche, he/she separates and detaches himself from her in order to gain instant pleasure. What is the point of being in a union if you are not exploring each other to the peak? There is strong encouragement within the realms of the practices of the Kama Sutra for men and women to be entirely open, honest, and uninhibited with each other about their sexual wants, needs, fantasies and wishes. But, between each other. In the bedroom, a man and woman are each other’s whores – this term I use in this context as meaning uninhibited, no holds, unrestricted, limitless, pure, raw, ascending sex. By involving pornography into this sacred bond between man and woman, it is only restricting the full possibility of emotional, mental, physical, spiritual transcendence possible between a man and woman. If you are in a union with a man or woman, try this as an experiment – instead of using the idea, image, visual counterpart of another man or woman to quell your sexual desires, try masturbating without porn –if you are separate in distance – or masturbating with each other. Seek to instead of imagining scenarios that do not involve your partner, lace your partner into all your fantasies as the key element. For whatever is a matter of mind will manifest itself into reality. If you are not satisfied with your partner it is not you nor your partner that is at fault. It is your lack of exploring each other to the peak. Because at essence, biological sex for the purposes of reproduction is possible between any healthy male and female, the potential for sexual bonding exists between any man and woman. If you take that base level of biology and combine it with the elements of Kama Sutra, you can have enlightened sex with any mate that you choose for your life.

Pornography would not be able to exist in a long-term oriented society. As a mass, our world within the past 50 years in particular, has become more needs-oriented and instant-gratification based than ever. Microwaves to replace learning to cook. Grocery stores to replace understanding agriculture & farming. Cliffs notes to replace reading a book. Internet social networking to replace real life human interaction. Wii sport-simulated video games to replace taking hikes in a forest. Pornography is fast food. It is instantly accessible, tastes good, fills you up, requires no self-mastery of any sort, is full of crap, and isn’t real. Long-term effects of fast food – heart attacks, rapid aging, bone defects, mental acuity decrease, lack of true health. The health aspect most of us are already quite aware of. Long term effects of pornography – lowered self-esteem, isolation from fellow human beings, insufficient sexual prowess, dysfunctional relationships, lack of true sexual transcendence. Women used to be able to birth children with zero aid, Men used to be able to build huts out of clay, build Rome & the Pyramids of Giza. Now women have been illuded to thinking that being true to their form is defining themselves by mass propaganda that is around them dictating to them what they should be, look like, feel, think, or act. Men are in a similar warp with Abercrombie & Fitch ads, alcohol advertisements & 12 inch penis enlargement infomercials telling them that this is what “real men” are. How much have we really evolved? We have become babies in terms of true self-survival. If Google crashed tomorrow, most high school students wouldn’t pass simple graduation requirements. Instead of individuals being encouraged to develop themselves to the heights of their own individuality, cookie cutter models of being are enforced as the prime optimum of what people must be. The point remains, the higher we each ascend as individuals, the more progressed as a species we will become. What is important is to be able to distinguish between actual progress, and devolution. What is evolution? Think of the happiest moment in your life, or sequences of such. I would be willing to bet that it was not a moment that was entirely devoid of love. Love – it has been described throughout the ages and defining what it is, is not the aim of this particular deconstruction. Merely to suggest that a state of evolution is a state of love. Our world has not aimed to make love its mission. Survival, has instead, been the overall mission. But survival is not so complicated. Survival on a base level requires little else than the bare necessities. What is much more important than survival is internal progression. Progression that is only reached thru attaining bliss, enlightenment, the state from which we all are born: Love.

We live in an age where few are happy with the true needs of life any longer, or what may be referred to as “the bare necessities”. When it is only thru the bare necessities that we have any hope of reaching true human potential. Buddha did not reach enlightenment by maximizing his productivity rate. We have word processors that perform thrice the labour for us in a fourth of the time, computers in themselves inventions that are out of a science fiction novel. Yet what are we as a mass doing with all this time that we have saved? Have we become more satisfied, or less? Are our needs greater, or lower, now that we are able to meet so many of them? Instead of seeking to have a world in which all beings have the bare minimum – food , water, air, shelter, certain societies that have already devised methods to meet their needs (America for example), are not satisfied and then seeking to help. Instead, as a cultural mass, further non-needs are being pushed as actual needs. Black Friday a horrific example of this disturbia. People literally killing each other over flatscreen TVs that they falsely have imagined they absolutely “need”. Instead of a focus being towards global peace, towards individual enlightenment and holistic transcendence towards humanitys’ progression – it is about individuals meeting their instant gratificationary needs. Which brings me back to a key point: pornography is not a need. It is an illusion. Sex is a need. Sex, in its base reality, is Love. Pornography, is not, real sex. But don’t take my word for it. Question everything for yourself. 

Choose Love

In Uncategorized on July 30, 2012 at 07:19

A Rant on Freedom ….

People. Their strange little beautiful ways. They like to talk about real things and normal things, reality and fantasy, as if everything that matters is much more important to speak of in real terms. Fantasy being some strange realm that only the weirdos exist in. The weirdos are the same people who change the world, yet, I forget sometimes that the majority of the world is quite normal, quite boring, quite mundane, and it is only a small fraction of people who truly give themselves the leeway to dream.
There are needs. There are wants. Wants are temporary. To live life based on wants can be misleading, because wants change all the time. Much of what you may have been told is designed to make you live a life that is geared towards temporary satisfaction of your immediate wants. No human being needs a 42 inch plasma television, for example. Examine whether the life that you are living is want-based or need-based, and how much of your freedom you are giving up for either. The catchphrase, “free time”, is a joke in itself. “In my free time, I like to have fun.” So then, in your “non-free” time, you don’t? “Fun”, a thing that has a somewhat negative connotation in society. A thing that must be reserved for “free time”, because to have fun is viewed as irresponsible. Every day of your life can be absolutely fun. Everyone’ s definition of what is fun to them is different. If you’re doing something every day that isn’t fun, Why? Because it fulfills another part of your life that is a need, or a want?
When determining what gives one pleasure, what gives one joy, it is important to distinguish between temporary satisfactions and long-lasting fulfillments. Internal emptiness results from the minutae accomplishment of making daily decisions, choices that when acted out appear to fill a hole in the space of time between sunrise and sunset. Yet when the summation of those choices does not equate to an overall feeling of satisfaction, one must reconsider the value of those choices.
“But how will I make a living?!” is a common question. People worry about this kind of thing in a system that is designed to make you worry about your own security. There is less of a focus on “I will figure it out”, and more of a focus on “be realistic”. Wherein again this idea of fantasy and reality come into play. Where it is considered a lot more “real” to “have a job” than to “create your own job”. That is when it once again becomes vitally important to examine the essence of a thing, its root. What is a job? It is the performance of a service that others need, which in the “real world” will garner you funds, to spend however you choose. The only way to generate cashflow is to, get a job, do criminal activity such as steal, or be a trust fund baby who is already born with it. Lie. And the “create your own job” is nowhere near the highest realm of freedom either. It is still based on the idea that money is tied to physical activity. For those who believe this to be the absolute truth, google keyword: passive income. When you actively examine all of the lies that you have been told, you will discover that there are doorways you perhaps have never opened which lead to truths you have never experienced as reality. The challenge is that most of the time, if not all of the time, because you are living a path that truly has never been walked before – since you are the only you that has ever lived, there is no user manual, there is no easy manual to figure anything out. It’s all on your shoulders. While there may be similar pathways that have been walked, say for example you aim to be a billionaire, and you read Richard Branson’s autobiography, or you want to be a great chess player so you read everything there is to know about chess strategy and Gary Kasparov. While these bits of knowledge can help on an emotional, intellectual and practical level, they cannot outline your path for you. You must walk your own path, and it is entirely unique to you. That is the scary part that most people don’t want to face, because it is definitely easier to stick to the tried path that has a guaranteed success factor to it. If safety is your aim, then pursuing freedom and actual truth is not for you. What freedom can offer you is the feeling of being free at all times. Not something which can be understood until it is felt. Feeling free is just as much of a reality as feeling trapped is. There is no fantasy to either aspect, each holds truth to the person who lives it. It is about preference, it is about choice, and everyone has a choice. There are no “have to’s” in any aspect of life. There are “choose to’s”. The element of responsibility that choice has within it is another facet that is terrifying to most. After all, if you stick to the standard route and you don’t find fulfillment at the end of the rainbow, you have so many people you can blame, and there is a comfort in that. You can blame your wife for making you buy that house that you have to work so hard to maintain, you can blame your husband for the children you birthed, you can blame your boss for how much you hate your job, you can blame your children for how much you hate that you gave up your freedom to have them, you can blame, blame, blame everyone for all of your problems. When you are a free being, you have nobody to answer to, and nobody to blame, but yourself. The reality of that can be very daunting, very scary, and very unsettling, especially to the indoctrinated mind that is used to a system which makes blame a part of daily life. E.g the restaurant you go to doesn’t have your favorite burger on the menu, blame the waiter, complain to their manager or customer service department –spout ideologies of consumer rights, get a free meal. Your phone service company just raised their minimums. Call the customer service department, spend 3 hours of your life talking to a stranger in India navigate you through the mountains of paperwork necessary for you to get out of your contract, blame the phone company for luring you into their evil-ness. Much of common life in many countries has an aspect of this experience-and-then-blame routine. Few individuals face up to accepting that their lives are exactly as they are because they have made them that way. It is a “I am a victim” mentality that is actually more encouraged than it is frowned upon. Society supports victimization, because victimization helps people let off their steam at being slaves. Without these occasional bursts of outrage, real anarchy would erupt. It’s a tough race for each rat to make their way to the golden cheese, so they must be allowed to be angry every once in a while. It’s important that there are team sports, that are basically war disguised as competition, that are participated in nationally, there must be channels for the people to vent out their rage. People have become very, very, very angry. They are living lives they hate, in a thwarted system that encourages their slavery, and they are too scared to break free of it or fight for anything new.
“Artists tell the truth through lies”.
Fantasy is not a denial of reality. It can be the exact opposite, the gateway to discover truth.
Within the world of people there seems to be a clear divide between those who live in the “real world”, and those who either avoid it, escape it, or survive above it. Usually a key factor in survival is money. The more money a person has, the easier it is to entirely avoid reality, or the reality that people without money face. Real issues such as starvation, homelessness, discomfort, overpopulation, are all problems of the poor, not the rich. Or so is the illusion. The reality being that poor people do not eat as much as the rich, do not live in fancy houses, do not attend glamorous parties or take expensive drugs to enliven their states. This reality is generally tied to the notion that such a life is devoid of happiness. That money, is what leads to happiness, and that is why more of it should be attained. Since rich people have access to all such luxuries, it is assumed that money is linked directly with happiness. Here is the grand illusion. Money does not provide happiness, and lack of money does not amass to depression. Money is simply a tool. This is a clear distinction which the general propaganda does not want to release as a mainstream idea. Because most of western civilization is constructed upon a series of lies. Lies such as , “Work at a 9-5 job for a corporation that likely cheats half of their employees, so that you can get a paycheck, and buy a bunch of stuff with it, and then you will be happy. If you do not abide by this idea, you are a failed citizen and loser human being.” The idea of course being force-fed all through traditional education systems, which push the idea of being an employee from the very first homework assignment, in a rewards-based system that roughly brainwashes its’ disciples to thinking, “if I get an A, I am good.” Morality becomes tied with busywork that is of no essential substance, does not advance the mind towards true independent thought, instead thwarts its’ growth, and makes one a perfect candidate to be a sheep in an employee-breeding economic structure. “Abide by authority and you will be rewarded. Disobey authority and you will be punished.” An entire police system is run upon this lie. So few citizens actually have the time, curiosity or will to examine whether the “laws” that run a country actually are important or necessary. It becomes not “Why should I follow this?”, but “I must follow this, or things will be bad.” And usually, they are. Try running naked in a “no nude” zone, for example, the chances of arrest are likely, arrest leading to jail time, a not pleasant experience. Yet to examine the law itself, “no public nudity”, is important. Why is it that it is against societal law to be nude in public? That it causes discomfort to other human citizens? Then it should be against the law to wear a certain color, if for example one absolutely has a distaste for the color green. A general survey should be performed among the masses to determine what people favor as an appropriate color, and all colors that go against this color must be prohibited. It must be that we have a law that says to wear green on Tuesdays is illeagal. If one were to examine any such law, that is considered “common”, it can be reduced to not only being absolutely ridiculous, but disturbing that the agreement of a group of people, somehow has a direct influence on the rest, to the point that it limits their freedoms. And that is the ultimate point, freedom. For the majority of modern civilization limits individual freedom. The lie, the illusion, is that the government, the system of law, capitalism, and free trade enterprise are all systems that make it possible for people to be free. Wrong. How can people be free when they don’t even understand the concept of freedom? Freedom is to be unchained by perceptions, beliefs, ideas, mindsets, systems, laws, concepts or idealogoies that are outside of the self. When your parents tell you that you cannot go out after a certain hour in your youth, they are putting a limitation on your freedom. You reach college and you delight in the free feeling of being able to stay out past 4 am and eat chocolate for breakfast. Yet society is very quick to instill chains upon you either during your college years with things like lecture times and schedules, or after graduation with things like jobs and societal pressure. You discover that if you want the fancy Bentley you always wanted growing up, you’ll have to have a job that gives you x amount of cash in order to buy it. So you get the job to get the Bentley. Sooner or later you get the Bentley. You feel accomplished. You feel you’ve attained your dream. Then you discover the insurance premiums on it may have to warrant you getting another job, or longer hours at your current one. You get a girlfriend/boyfriend. Those cost money. You take them out to dinners, do stuff like parasailing, buy a yacht. You feel temporarily pleased yet again. Still though, there is something nagging at you and you’re not quite sure what it is. You figure the way to solve this nagging feeling is to buy another gadget/thing/food item/trip to Morrocco. Now you’re 45 and somehow have a house, 2 children, a wife/husband, and an album of vacations to Europe and you don’t know who you are when you look in the mirror. Maybe that day you see an attractive teenager, you feel sexual desire that you haven’t felt for your spouse for years, and something about the incident triggers a memory you had of your childhood when you used to spend hours looking up at the stars and imagining you were an astronaut with purple wings. Then you snap out of it and remember that little Billy needs to be picked up from his tennis lesson at 3 and then you have a meeting with your broker at 4:45 and then dinner with your boss- who gets on your nerves but you’re hoping that if you wear your new amazing suit/dress that you’ll finally get that promotion you’ve been longing for so you can buy that incredible Mazaratti. The Bentley is looking pretty lame these days.
Are you happy? Are you fulfilled? You have the degree from Oxford, you have the tie from Gucci, you’ve been the best kid out of your family, you’ve fulfilled all of your necessary functions. So what is this…thing…that refuses to go away? Why is it that sometimes, you walk into the street and imagine another life? Why do you feel entirely exhausted, out of time, wishing you just had 5 minutes to simply breathe? You followed all the rules, you did all the right things, you did your best to be good. Why then have you developed your strange little habits that none of your balanced friends know about?
You are trapped, friend.
And you will remain trapped until you die if you don’t wake up.
The sad part is, most people don’t. Because waking up requires real work. It is not easy. It requires rigorous examination of everything you’ve ever been told from day 1 on this planet.
Most of what you have been told, read about, or been instructed to follow has not been designed to encourage your freedom or individual growth. The majority of it has been a blatant lie that is so perfectly packaged, so neatly prepared, that it appears to be real. Here’s the truth. The minute that you discover that any part of your life is not entirely a creation of your own will, you have just discovered your own prison. You are now at a crucial turning point in which you will either remain chained, in a state of temporary satisfaction, or you will break off the chains. Freedom is not what the system wants. A world in which every individual is free? Why, that would be chaos, surely. A society in which every being is free?! Why, everyone would try to kill each other, cheat, lie, steal! No,no, we must be chained to rules, order. That’s the dogma working in perfection.
Rarely, if never, is it ever proposed that people would be peaceful, loving, kind individuals, who live in freedom, as free beings. That they could evolve their own mentalities to such a point that all citizens are peaceful and loving. The dogma is that war is a fact of life, that people are brute animals, that people are so limited in their consciousness that peace is impossible. Socialism is naïve, and those damn commies with their communist idiocies! Utopia is not even considered to be an actual possibility. The idea that we can all get along, peacefully, harmoniously, while still maintaining our individual freedoms is labeled as an ideal that will most likely never be achieved.
Just like that whole, racial integration thing. Blacks and whites drinking from the same water fountain. Bah! Nonsense.
“Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened by responsibility.”-Sigmund Freud.
The responsibility our dear psycho-rapist friend Freud is referring to here is not a responsibility to the rat race. A responsibility to and for the self. To the Id. To freely follow one’s own course, entirely independently of anything other than one’s own direction. That kind of responsibility is daunting, because it is almost all risk with little guarantee of reward. Leave a job that pays for an opulent lifestyle so that you have time to look at flowers all day? Why the hell would any rational human being want to do that? To be laughed at by friends, ostracized by family, mocked by society, all for what exactly? Not only is it a terrifying idea to entertain, it’s the sort of madness that screams of poverty and depression. The kind of insanity that lands people in jail or addicted to heroin.
That Einstein must have been entirely off his rocker for leaving his position as a patent clerk to pose the theory of relativity to the world. Thank goodness it worked out for him. I mean, it could have went horribly, horribly wrong! Yeah…Better to acknowledge one’s own limitations and take comfort in the mediocre comforts of an upper-class suburban lifestyle. Pretty curtains don’t come cheap, you know.
When people have spent their entire lives being inculcated with the same nonsense day after day, they don’t have a minute to stand back and examine whether what they are living makes any sense. After a day’s work, there are television shows to be watched, there are poker games with the boys to attend, there are work functions which include all the same people from the workplace, there are clubs to party at on the weekends that are full of gym-bodied young people gyrating in various mating dances, there are social functions that are full of egoically-competitive mindless conversations to engage in, there are activities to be done and races to be won. It’s a busy, busy, place after all, and Jesus could come down at any minute and send everyone to hell if they’re not being productive.
Thinkers, historically, with a few innovative exceptions like Bill Gates, are generally poor. Until they become rich, famous, both, or neither. But until thus point they are generally labeled “crazy”, “dangerous”, or “dreamers” by the general populace. They’re not too fond of rules, these thinker types. They tend to do obscene things like enjoy life. The absolute nerve! They don’t act responsibly or rationally, these strange people, these weirdos, these freaks. They read odd books, they go to the cinema in the daytime on weekdays, they spout new-ageisms like “believe”, they have the audacity to be 50 year olds who still muse about “the meaning of life”. Grow up! Get Real! They’re children, basically, who don’t understand the important things about life like taxes and keeping appointments. They’re useless, lazy, and it would be much better if the world were rid of them. Accountants are much more needed, who would keep track of all the money?!
Interestingly, thinkers, when they do become rich, famous, or both, are said to be people who change the world. Sometimes they die before anything happens. Van Gogh was an entirely useless pathetically irresponsible citizen. The gall to sit painting all day! Rubbish.
Here’s the truth that you may not have been privy to your entire life: you are limitless.
There isn’t a talent that if you don’t apply yourself to you can’t master. There is no dream that is too grand. There is no “impossible”. There is no giant canyon of despair if you break a rule. There is no sadness that is based on external things. There is no happiness based on external things.
Each individual is exactly that: an individual. An entirely unique being from any other prior to or after. That’s the truth that you haven’t been told. What you have been told is that you’re just like everyone else. You have your talents, strengths, weaknesses, and categories that you fall into. You are either thin or fat, beautiful or ugly, talented or untalented, smart or stupid, rich or poor. Pick the labels that apply to you and then figure out which path is best to take based upon those labels. Pretty people should be models. Smart people should be academics. Rich people shop at Versace. Your guidance counselor in your freshman year told you that you have an aptitude for complex calculation and aren’t suited towards people-friendly professions. You’re a mathematician/data processor/computer programmer now. Somehow you find yourself imagining that teaching children might be fun, but, you’re just not suited for it, it’s simply not your skill set. That’s the lie. There isn’t a single thing that anyone cannot do. Freedom isn’t about giving up who you are. It’s about embracing who you are, full throttle, without fear, shame, guilt or worry. It is living by your own code of conduct, your own standards, your own values, your own passions. In the classic film SLC Punk, a wannabe free-thinker discovers through his own posed lifestyle that who he actually is at heart is a corporate suit, the very thing that he refuses to accept he is. Life is full of lies that try to tell you who you are. The only person who really knows is you. Free your mind. Free yourself. Discover who you actually are, what you actually enjoy, what you actually dislike, and be true to it. Maybe you’re a banker who dreams of being an artist. Maybe you’re an artist who dreams of being a banker. Whatever it is that you are not living, whatever chains that you have within you telling you that you “can’t” do something, ask yourself the fundamental question of all questions : Why?

Life is Entirely, Up To You.

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Your fear is a manifestation of your doubt. Doubt causes irrational elements such as insecurity and lack of logic to overwhelm the human mind – which in its’ pure form is a machine capable of limitless feats. Feats, are the invisible residing in the visible. In order for the invisible to become visible, it must reach a tipping point of where its invisibility can go nowhere than to appear in reality. Imagine this process as a surplus of water barging against a dam. The point of pressure at which the dam breaks and the water is released, can be comparable to the invisible becoming visible. Irrationality builds pressure, but it does not release it. Fear, is therefore rational. Doubt implies that there are variables which are out of your control. By increasing the likelihood of all variables being within your control, your doubt diminishes, thereby eliminating your fear. The target of any given motive is to win. Winning is a release of pressure. An orgasm.  Whether the target is world peace, grocery shopping, causing a smile on a human’s face, mastery of a talent, – all concrete goals visible in nature, to abstract goals such as enlightenment, inner peace, self-actualization. The attainment of any motive, is winning. Anything which stands in the way of a motive is not an obstacle, it is only a function of the chaos theory which suggests that everything effects everything. What is crucial to recognize about any motive in life is that as exists from life –not outside of it, it therefore existed always and will revert to a lack of motive –or nothingness, if unattained. There is no negative or positive consequence for winning or losing, there are only probabilities and impossibilities. Fear is not an illusion, it is real, and rational. It indicates that there are more impossibilities towards a given motive that you are aware of at any given moment in time than probabilities. It is not courage which defeats fear, therefore, it is simply understanding that action will cause reaction, and lack of action will result in defunct plateau. The x/y axis of life is infinite, with death only being an obstacle of current human nature because it appears more of a probability than an impossibility. When you eliminate the idea of time, you will see that your fear is your mind outlining your lack of forethought in any given scenario. Calculate all possibilities, then execute the one most likely to achieve a motive, and while fear may still be present –it becomes ultimately irrelevant.  If one seeks, for example, an ostrich, one should not go hunting for it on a chicken farm. Increasing the percentage of winning is a matter of timing, strategy, attention to detail, and acknowledgement of truth. Winning is possible in any scenario when the scenario of winning itself is seen as a deducible pattern of causality. Find an ostrich farm, isolate an ostrich of one’s choosing, control the ability of the ostrich to escape to such a point that it is impossible, and then obtaining the target ostrich is no longer a hopeful wish, nor an eager expectation, it is simply the truth of action meeting reaction.  The final point beyond fear, and beyond motive, is realizing that there is nothing required of a human being, ever. This is freedom. To be free is to be at a point of readiness at all times to jump into a motive and move it towards a win, but to know that such jumping is never compulsory – only a matter of will. Recognizing the presence of choice defeats all irrationality. You are not alive because you are required to be alive. You can easily end your life. You are alive because you choose not to be dead. If you live in fear of your own death – which would signify an absence of any motive ever being attained from that point – you are not living as a free being. When one is absolutely free, one is absolutely love – for love is a state that is devoid of motive. Love, as living, does not require anything from you other than to be fully present. A state of absolute fear cannot co-exist with a state of absolute love. The greatest illusion a human mind has is the belief that winning a motive is a mark of living, and that such living is interlinked with love. Attainment is always a step-by-step process that is rational – it exists for as long as it exists, has a beginning and end. It is living perpetually in the future, continually towards pushing a given invisibility to the point of pressure at which it becomes a visibility. Love is an absence of motive – it is a state of zero expectation, and has no need of its invisibility manifesting into visibility. There is no proof of love, neither is there of freedom, or of living. Each of these simply, are, or are not. Thinking that a set of won motives will prove that you are alive, or that in so doing you have known love or are love, is an illusion. What you are at base, is love, is free, and all you know how to output from your base-state is love. Everything else is possible because everything else is either a possibility or an impossibility. If you are alive you know you are not dead. Love, is knowing. If you live, you love. 

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